Your Precious Gift...

Your Precious Gift...
To create a Bible based environment in our home life that allows are children to thrive in constant P.R.A.I.S.E.

Prayer
Righteousness
Abundance
Innocence
Servanthood
Excellence

Romans 12: 2

Don't copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God's will for you, which is good, pleasing and perfect.

Everyone knows that being a teenager is one of the hardest seasons of life, they have peer pressure, academic pressure, life decision making, Family, Relationship, TEMPTATION all while building and maintaining their relationship with God. It’s that defining moment when right in the middle of enjoying being a teenager; maturity slithers in and demands their attention. It’s finding that delicate balance between enjoying their “lack of responsibility” yet at the same time longing for respect and acknowledgement that they are “becoming” adults.
It is our JOB privilege as parents to make sure this process is as smooth as possible with discipleship through relationship. It is so easy to complain about this season of life that we forget to stop and enjoy it. Eighteen years is a precious short time to have our children in our lives and we let that time slip away so fast.
Important Things You’ll Need

*Prayer
*Patience
*Dedication
*Love
*The Word

*DON'T GIVE UP Teenagers struggle with their identity and less than one out of three will find the help and encouragement they need.. It is during the periods of time when teenagers do not feel supported that they can act out. Especially when it’s hard or difficult and your teenager may be communicating a lack of interest in a mentor/discipleship relationship, it is essential to always remain available and persistent.

*SET BOUNDARIES for expectations and communication. Your teenager will act out less if they know the rules in advance and what you expect from them. It also allows better control of situations before they get out of control. Do not let your communication get out of control. Teenagers are great at trying to deflect issues by becoming argumentative or verbally abusive. Two key words allow you to take control of any situation. Regardless and Nevertheless are key tools in letting your teenager know that you have heard their complaint and frustration and allow you at the same time to return to the actual issue.

*COMMUNICATE While it's not necessarily useful to push the teenager to communicate with you about personal issues they have in their life, it is essential that you ask about them. As children grow they begin to develop their own very distinct personalities and even if they aren't able to share with you, it is a great message to hear that you care. This also does not mean that you allow your teenager to run over the top of you, but that you are available to discuss these things with them

*GIVE YOUR ALL It is important for a teenager to get the benefit of having your undivided attention from time to time. Make dates with your teenager and allow him/her to choose the location or activity. Maybe it's as simple as grabbing a soda or taking a walk. Maybe you have a monthly activity or go to a sports event... just the two of you. This behavior reinforces their sense of importance, self esteem, and continues to make available an open and personal line of communication with the teen.

*KEEP YOUR PROMISES It is incredibly important for you to take your role as a parent seriously and to never back out on your teenager. If you tell them you are going to do something… FOLLOW THROUGH. The messages you send when you back out of an obligation quality time can drastically detract from the relationship.

*SPEAK IN POSITIVES Learn to phrase your advice in the affirmative voice rather than the negative voice. Instead of saying "Don't forget to..." say "Remember to..."

*EXPLAIN WHY This is one of the most important parts of communicating with teens. If you don't explain why you are giving the advice that you are giving, it seems like a simple directive and there is no emotional attachment to following your instruction. If you explain WHY you believe that safe sex, abstinence, etc. is a good idea... it will make more sense to a teen.

*TELL THE TRUTH It is important not to deceive your teenager with the intent to try and affect their behavior. Lying to them about why something is dangerous, or what the benefits or liabilities are of a decision is not very fair; nor will they trust you in the future should they catch you in a lie. Instead, teach your teenager responsible decision-making by being honest about all the options and lovingly guiding them.

*DISCIPLINE WITH LOVE News Flash!! Teenagers are not perfect. But let’s be honest… none of us are. By showing disappointment while not simultaneously showing love and understanding can cause your teenager to develop a complex that they can’t ever do anything right. Also it can cause you to jeopardize your relationship. Explain to the teenager what the repercussions of their decisions are. Remember to tell them that you still love them even if they've messed up.

*TELL THEM YOU LOVE THEM As often as possible. When they least expect it. And don't just do it with your words. Following some of these aforementioned steps will SHOW them that you love them. It is crucial your teenager know that you love and care about them. Never miss an opportunity to show them how much you love them.

God Bless

Chi

Good morning WORLD

So I have been out more this week, because Gracie has testing so here I sit at Starbucks (Still holding my b-day present for when I am hanging with Mel) sharing my little ramblings with the world. And I have to tell you today, I am frustrated and bewildered and the behavior of the people around me.

Let me set the scene for you... 3 women sitting next to me, discussing the successes and failures (mostly failures I am sad to say) of their children, they talk about how graduating from Kindergarten is NOT a big deal and they shouldn't have to take time out of their busy schedules to attend, how their child DOES NOT need a new outfit and that they can just pick out anything from their closet. To quote one Mom: "This is my third child, been there done that".

It is important to understand that these are the same women that 15 minutes prior were talking about the resort they stayed at that was $600.00 per night and how being "Stay at home" mom's allowed them to do this, so obviously work and money was not the issue. Imagine my shock to find that of these three women... one of the children are adopted from another country. So this is supposed to be a "Chosen" child. They spent the time complaining about how their children are spoiled and they can't deal with them. HELLO??? WHO is raising them??

What a huge contrast to our parenting group. In that moment my heart broke for their children. It was clear that they have missed that their children are precious gifts to be honored and treasured, not cast aside without a thought. In Ephesians 5:13 is says: "But all things that are reproved are made manifest by the light: for whatsoever doth make manifest is light." What light are they pouring into their children? More importantly... what is that light's source?

I encourage you to tell your children everyday, that you love and treasure them. Praise their successes especially to your friends. Be gentle and loving always. Before you know it, they are gone, raised and gone their way and you want to make sure they carry those cherished memories with them everywhere life takes them.

God Bless,

Chi

If you don't give up

And you don't give in, you may just be okay

This is from a song, and I am afraid to say I don't remember which one, but I am pretty sure that it is something country since that is what 50% of my household listens to most of the time. For some reason this lyric has been stuck in my head all day. And it's got me to thinking (uh oh... look out world), about how many times we give up quickly and move on to something easier.

So let's use an example that's real. Losing weight. I would love to have my son's gift of massively high metabolic rate, but the reality is, I don't. So too many times I "try", "Fail" and then give up. I know, Wtg RIGHT? For me? This is my one weakness, the one thing that I feel holds me back the most and the one place I keep giving up. And I get tired of it, so very tired of it. I could quote multiple scriptures at this moment, but really it all breaks down to Philippians 4:13 "I can do ALL things THROUGH Christ who gives ME STRENGTH."

So I have decided:

I'm doing this for me. Not for those who called me too fat to be pretty.
Not for the snooty vendors who look down on me when I try on dresses.
Not for those who say "Too bad, she has a pretty face".
Not to make my parents happy.
Not to fit in to a stereotypical idea of beauty.

I'm doing this to get healthy.
To show myself that I can.
To be a strong woman: I can be athletic. I can be beautiful.
I want to feel good in my own skin.
I want to find MYSELF beautiful.
I want to look in my mirror and smile.

I don't want to think "What if I felt good in my skin ..." anymore.
I don't want to look at a beautiful dress and think "Too bad..."
I don't want to think of myself in disgust. My body and I deserve better than that.
I don't want to mistreat my body. It's not my own little garbage can.
I don't want to devalue my health.
I do not want to binge and purge, binge and purge.
I do not want to punish myself anymore.

I'm going to do this, slowly but surely.

And it's going to make all the difference.

God Bless,

Chi