The book and the cover

So Shaun and I went to dinner on Sunday to a buffet style restaurant and being a people watcher, I of course chose to sit close to the buffet tables to provide a better view.  You can see all types of people and whether you realize it or not, you being to categorize and/or profile them.

Probably my biggest pet peeve is young men that are not sure how to pull their pants up so they wear them down below their “tushie” with their boxers showing.  As and “Adult” I don’t understand why they do this and personally think it’s ridiculous.

There was a particular young man in about his mid-twenties dressed (although not as extreme and I have seen in others) like that at the restaurant.  My first reaction (in my head):  “What is wrong with this guy?  Someone needs to tell him to grow up and do something with his life… Kids like this are just what is wrong with the world”. 

Imagine my surprise (and SHAME), when a fashionably dressed older woman walked up, gave him a hug and then said: “Pastor, my son said your message in youth group was amazing!  Thank you for touching our children’s lives”!   Wow… boy did I get that wrong!!!!

It reminds me of when Shaun and I went to the doctor to get the results from the blood work we had done.  The doctor looked at Shaun and said:  “To the world, you look like the healthy one, but she (pointing to me) is the healthy one”.  He then went on to explain some of the life changes Shaun needed to make to bring down his cholesterol and other challenges.  This really came back to me in that moment of hearing that young man being addressed as Pastor

Because even though “The world” may have its own perception; how often do we (as Christ followers) allow what we see on the outside to judge the heart that is on the inside?  I had completely written this young man off and there he was changing lives for the King of Kings.  In Matthew 7:1-4 it says:
“Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you. Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? How often do we use that scripture when we feel like we are being judged?  We quickly forget verse 5 that says: “You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye”.  You see we look at others though the law but expect them (AND GOD) to look at us through the eyes of Grace. 

I want the world to know what I am for because they see love, not what I am against because they see judgment.  This doesn’t mean that we ignore things that are wrong but rather that we love people in spite of them being messy and having messed up lives.  It also means that I will think twice before making assumptions.  J

Jesus Shoes and walking out patience

So I am trying to be a good girl and living on a budget and NOT taking money out of savings to make purchases but rather exercising patience and waiting for the money to come in.

 So there I was on a Wednesday night... doing my Target shopping and knowing that my pay check would be deposited shortly... and I came across these lovely little red patent leather wedges! They were just gorgeous and the Dorothy in me just had to have them. THANK GOD that a pair of new shoes were already in the budget!! They had one size 6 left... that was definitely a sign from heaven!!

So I finished my shopping and by 9 PM, my check (which is always in by 8PM) was still not in. Immediately I was frustrated... what the heck was going on?!?! There I was with a shopping cart full of groceries and my beautiful red shoes. Shaun, who is the most patient man on the planet, told me to just wait... what?? Wait?? But I have things to do and it's getting late!!!

15 minutes later I ended up in the car (alone) listening to Blessings by Laura Story and just praying... At 10, I gave it up... "Ok God, I understand... those shoes were just not meant to be". We went home and for whatever reason, my check didn't get deposited until the next morning.

After work, Shaun suggested that we go back to Target to get the shoes. I have to admit I was certain they were going to be gone because it was the last pair and they were just so pretty!! I suggested we try a different Target first on the way home, when we got there, they were sold out and the sales clerk said they sold super fast. I wanted to go home but Shaun was determined so back to our Target we went... and you know something? Not only were my pretty red shoes in my size still there... but they had been marked down from $24.99 to $7.49!! I was able to get them in black and tan also for the less than the price that I had budgeted for just a single pair!!

 How many times to we do this to ourselves?? Just assume that God doesn't want to bless us when life doesn't go exactly as we planned or settle for the "good" when the great is right around the corner??? James 1:2-8 says: Count it all joy, my brothers (and sister shoe shoppers), when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

For me? Me and my 3 pairs of new shoes like the sound of that!!! :)

What the heck am I thinking??

So recently we had a neighbor change in our area and I was quite a bit concerned about the new tenants. One of those reasons being the 19 yr old young lady that has a rather, shall we say "wild" lifestyle. So of course, she zones in on my very handsome (Yes I am biased but he is adorable) 17 year old son... and I?

Well initially I panicked. My first gut reaction was to restrict him to the house to reduce any possible negative influence she might have, but let's face it, you can't keep an almost grown man shut up in the house indefinitely so that was out. My second was to talk to her and let her know that my son was a minor and that she should NOT be seeking him out, but then try inviting someone to church after THAT conversation. But finally, my senses kicked in and I did what I should have done in the first place, I prayed and opened my Bible. And what a weird experience to be hit with conviction and peace at the same time, but that's exactly what happened.

The conviction was for not reaching for my word & prayer first and for doubting in the first place, but beautiful blessed peace because I know how we have raised our son, and that he WILL make the right choices.

Proverbs 22:6 clearly tells us to:

6 "Train up a child in the way he should go, Even when he is old he will not depart from it".

Glory Hallelujah! Is it really that simple? Yes it is. This does not mean that we are foolish or turning a blind eye but rather we are allowing our son to use his wisdom to make decisions for his life. We are also making sure that we are more interactive with our community, spending time outside, connecting with those around us and being in the area.

Raising a teenager can be hard at times, but there is so much joy and satisfaction in it and I promise you... it is WORTH it!!!! :)

God Bless!!

Chi

CrAzY Month!!

So it has been a crazy month, and I haven't been on as much as I would like.

The best way to describe it would be this:

ouch

So you see what happened was...

I was leaving the Tim McGraw concert on Sunday night and was accidentally pushed into a pothole by drunk idiots intoxicated people and turned both ankles.

So I have a Hairline re-fracture on the top of my left ankle with pulled tendons and ligaments. Bad sprain on right ankle. Good times.

Thank God for Toradol and morphine and hospital WiFi. :/

So needless to say... I DID NOT start my job on Monday, the 6th but they were really understanding and my new start date was today, June 20th. I love my job, but my ankles? Not so much

Also can I just tell you that it bugs me that I can't attach some great photography story to this?? Noooooo nothing that exciting... But below is my most sincere note to Mr. McGraw:

Dear Tim McGraw

My husband and I attended your show in San Diego on Sunday, June 5th. What an electrifying amazing show. We enjoyed every minute of it... Then the unthinkable happened (cue dramatic music here... da da daaaa)

As we were leaving a couple of rather intoxicated fans, were pushing and teasing each other, their conversation went a little like this:

Her: "Oh he's so good and sexy and let's face it hun... You're no Tim McGraw" (Good natured shove happens at this point)

Him: (slurred speech) "That's ok, you're sure's hell no Faith Hill"

(Not so good natured shove sends said fan careening into me, at which point I tried to side step and step into a pothole turning both ankles inward and ended my night in E.R and then admitted into the hospital and still here today (Wednesday, June 8th).

So in my best Taylor Swift mode I dedicate this to you...

But when I think, Tim McGraw

I try not to think of that concert flaw

It’s ok that I can’t dance all night long

Because the people beside me drank till they were bombed

When I think EMT

I try not to think about how they pushed me

Don’t think of my ankles swollen or blue

There was nothing you could do

But when I think Tim McGraw

I think black and blue :P

Looking forward to your next concert although I might just wait until the parking lot is empty until I leave ;)

Chi

Your Precious Gift...

Your Precious Gift...
To create a Bible based environment in our home life that allows are children to thrive in constant P.R.A.I.S.E.

Prayer
Righteousness
Abundance
Innocence
Servanthood
Excellence

Romans 12: 2

Don't copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God's will for you, which is good, pleasing and perfect.

Everyone knows that being a teenager is one of the hardest seasons of life, they have peer pressure, academic pressure, life decision making, Family, Relationship, TEMPTATION all while building and maintaining their relationship with God. It’s that defining moment when right in the middle of enjoying being a teenager; maturity slithers in and demands their attention. It’s finding that delicate balance between enjoying their “lack of responsibility” yet at the same time longing for respect and acknowledgement that they are “becoming” adults.
It is our JOB privilege as parents to make sure this process is as smooth as possible with discipleship through relationship. It is so easy to complain about this season of life that we forget to stop and enjoy it. Eighteen years is a precious short time to have our children in our lives and we let that time slip away so fast.
Important Things You’ll Need

*Prayer
*Patience
*Dedication
*Love
*The Word

*DON'T GIVE UP Teenagers struggle with their identity and less than one out of three will find the help and encouragement they need.. It is during the periods of time when teenagers do not feel supported that they can act out. Especially when it’s hard or difficult and your teenager may be communicating a lack of interest in a mentor/discipleship relationship, it is essential to always remain available and persistent.

*SET BOUNDARIES for expectations and communication. Your teenager will act out less if they know the rules in advance and what you expect from them. It also allows better control of situations before they get out of control. Do not let your communication get out of control. Teenagers are great at trying to deflect issues by becoming argumentative or verbally abusive. Two key words allow you to take control of any situation. Regardless and Nevertheless are key tools in letting your teenager know that you have heard their complaint and frustration and allow you at the same time to return to the actual issue.

*COMMUNICATE While it's not necessarily useful to push the teenager to communicate with you about personal issues they have in their life, it is essential that you ask about them. As children grow they begin to develop their own very distinct personalities and even if they aren't able to share with you, it is a great message to hear that you care. This also does not mean that you allow your teenager to run over the top of you, but that you are available to discuss these things with them

*GIVE YOUR ALL It is important for a teenager to get the benefit of having your undivided attention from time to time. Make dates with your teenager and allow him/her to choose the location or activity. Maybe it's as simple as grabbing a soda or taking a walk. Maybe you have a monthly activity or go to a sports event... just the two of you. This behavior reinforces their sense of importance, self esteem, and continues to make available an open and personal line of communication with the teen.

*KEEP YOUR PROMISES It is incredibly important for you to take your role as a parent seriously and to never back out on your teenager. If you tell them you are going to do something… FOLLOW THROUGH. The messages you send when you back out of an obligation quality time can drastically detract from the relationship.

*SPEAK IN POSITIVES Learn to phrase your advice in the affirmative voice rather than the negative voice. Instead of saying "Don't forget to..." say "Remember to..."

*EXPLAIN WHY This is one of the most important parts of communicating with teens. If you don't explain why you are giving the advice that you are giving, it seems like a simple directive and there is no emotional attachment to following your instruction. If you explain WHY you believe that safe sex, abstinence, etc. is a good idea... it will make more sense to a teen.

*TELL THE TRUTH It is important not to deceive your teenager with the intent to try and affect their behavior. Lying to them about why something is dangerous, or what the benefits or liabilities are of a decision is not very fair; nor will they trust you in the future should they catch you in a lie. Instead, teach your teenager responsible decision-making by being honest about all the options and lovingly guiding them.

*DISCIPLINE WITH LOVE News Flash!! Teenagers are not perfect. But let’s be honest… none of us are. By showing disappointment while not simultaneously showing love and understanding can cause your teenager to develop a complex that they can’t ever do anything right. Also it can cause you to jeopardize your relationship. Explain to the teenager what the repercussions of their decisions are. Remember to tell them that you still love them even if they've messed up.

*TELL THEM YOU LOVE THEM As often as possible. When they least expect it. And don't just do it with your words. Following some of these aforementioned steps will SHOW them that you love them. It is crucial your teenager know that you love and care about them. Never miss an opportunity to show them how much you love them.

God Bless

Chi

Good morning WORLD

So I have been out more this week, because Gracie has testing so here I sit at Starbucks (Still holding my b-day present for when I am hanging with Mel) sharing my little ramblings with the world. And I have to tell you today, I am frustrated and bewildered and the behavior of the people around me.

Let me set the scene for you... 3 women sitting next to me, discussing the successes and failures (mostly failures I am sad to say) of their children, they talk about how graduating from Kindergarten is NOT a big deal and they shouldn't have to take time out of their busy schedules to attend, how their child DOES NOT need a new outfit and that they can just pick out anything from their closet. To quote one Mom: "This is my third child, been there done that".

It is important to understand that these are the same women that 15 minutes prior were talking about the resort they stayed at that was $600.00 per night and how being "Stay at home" mom's allowed them to do this, so obviously work and money was not the issue. Imagine my shock to find that of these three women... one of the children are adopted from another country. So this is supposed to be a "Chosen" child. They spent the time complaining about how their children are spoiled and they can't deal with them. HELLO??? WHO is raising them??

What a huge contrast to our parenting group. In that moment my heart broke for their children. It was clear that they have missed that their children are precious gifts to be honored and treasured, not cast aside without a thought. In Ephesians 5:13 is says: "But all things that are reproved are made manifest by the light: for whatsoever doth make manifest is light." What light are they pouring into their children? More importantly... what is that light's source?

I encourage you to tell your children everyday, that you love and treasure them. Praise their successes especially to your friends. Be gentle and loving always. Before you know it, they are gone, raised and gone their way and you want to make sure they carry those cherished memories with them everywhere life takes them.

God Bless,

Chi

If you don't give up

And you don't give in, you may just be okay

This is from a song, and I am afraid to say I don't remember which one, but I am pretty sure that it is something country since that is what 50% of my household listens to most of the time. For some reason this lyric has been stuck in my head all day. And it's got me to thinking (uh oh... look out world), about how many times we give up quickly and move on to something easier.

So let's use an example that's real. Losing weight. I would love to have my son's gift of massively high metabolic rate, but the reality is, I don't. So too many times I "try", "Fail" and then give up. I know, Wtg RIGHT? For me? This is my one weakness, the one thing that I feel holds me back the most and the one place I keep giving up. And I get tired of it, so very tired of it. I could quote multiple scriptures at this moment, but really it all breaks down to Philippians 4:13 "I can do ALL things THROUGH Christ who gives ME STRENGTH."

So I have decided:

I'm doing this for me. Not for those who called me too fat to be pretty.
Not for the snooty vendors who look down on me when I try on dresses.
Not for those who say "Too bad, she has a pretty face".
Not to make my parents happy.
Not to fit in to a stereotypical idea of beauty.

I'm doing this to get healthy.
To show myself that I can.
To be a strong woman: I can be athletic. I can be beautiful.
I want to feel good in my own skin.
I want to find MYSELF beautiful.
I want to look in my mirror and smile.

I don't want to think "What if I felt good in my skin ..." anymore.
I don't want to look at a beautiful dress and think "Too bad..."
I don't want to think of myself in disgust. My body and I deserve better than that.
I don't want to mistreat my body. It's not my own little garbage can.
I don't want to devalue my health.
I do not want to binge and purge, binge and purge.
I do not want to punish myself anymore.

I'm going to do this, slowly but surely.

And it's going to make all the difference.

God Bless,

Chi